Tales From The Bleachers

Hey TFTB fans – or should I say HEYYYY BATTER BATTER HEY…I know – it’s been a while – and frankly – not sure you’re still out there, but hey, just fine with this blog as a personal diary. In fact,  thinking of reverting to a classic, pink, comeswithalock, must write with instrument…diary.  The problem with that is – say it with me… HAND CRAMP!

If you’re reading, great.  If not, you’re not.  Hopefully I’ll be able to fill in some gaps as to why I have not had (and I’m not being dramatic here) a MINUTE, LITERALLY… to blog in the last 3 months – and no, not going to skip happy hours to blog, (but thanks in advance for the input…)  But have faith…I will absolutely amplify the drama that has gone on in the interim…for the benefit of the blog which means for the benefit of your amusement – in the coming days.  And trust me, it’s rich, RICH I tell you!

Anyway HERE’S THE THOUGHT FOR TODAY…

BASEBALL SEASON IS UPON US!!

My personal fave.  Yes haters…BECAUSE it’s slow, mellow, America’s game (cue James Earl Jones…”BASEball”) and again…slows it all down.  Oh yeah, and…typically associated with SUN and HEAT.  So, MLB Spring training is still in session, in youth sports practices just under way, in high school baseball games start this week…THEREFORE, I am sharing with you my version, of THE COUNT (may or may not be an ongoing series during the season, but likely..if only to track Hank’s count)

1 HOMERUN (varsity baseball, first at bat, YES!)

1 PIE (fruits of the forest pie from gourmet grocery – HANK, in the KITCHEN, at 2 AM, with THE PAWS)

4 ALTERED BASEBALL PANTS (to long, too wide, not high enough for wearin’up, hole in the ass)

2,500 DOLLARS (fees, trip to Arizona for Varsity tournament, bats, cleats, vet bill)

2lb CORNED BEEF (3/18, left over from St. Patty’s, Hank left alone for 5 minutes)

1 BEAN BALL

1 CYLINDER of Quaker Oats (lower shelf, pantry, 2 a.m. on a Saturday)

4 WALKS

1 DOUBLE

1 SINGLE

1 ESPN HIGHLIGHT (on the run from short, the freshmen saves a run and ends the inning with a scoop @2nd)

GOODNIGHT SPORTS FANS. May or may not see you tomorrow…(have SOOO much to share, teaser alert…high school football team goin to Disney (WHY?), new booster club boss (loves a good flow chart), rumors of embezzled funds in kids’ sports, cat fight (yeah, this is breaking…but stick with me), youth coaches come back to haunt us at the high school level (aka as HS), boys growing up, and seeing the future…) stick with us here at tftb!